8 Reasons You Should Be Happy When You Fail

Have you failed at something lately?  If you have, great job.  There isn’t anyone on this planet who can truthfully say they haven’t failed at something at some point in their life.

Failing is a natural part of the growing, maturing and development process of the human race.  We fail because we are growing, we are exploring and we want solutions to life’s problems. We were meant to be curious, and curiosity will eventually lead us to success, but failure is a part of it all.

Unfortunately, we were taught that our failures were a sign weakness, bad luck and bad attempts at trying to improve our lives. The very same mistakes that are a sign of our ongoing attempt at living have been used to discourage and undermine our efforts to become better people.

Whenever we fail, we are tempted to fall apart, get down on ourselves and feel like our lives are over.  We question our intelligence and reason for doing what we did in the first place.

“Failure is an event, not a person.” – Zig Ziglar

Since we all make mistakes, you must remember that the mistake is never the issue it’s the way you choose to deal with your emotions when you do.  You will feel bad when you fail, and that is normal but giving up on your dreams is never the right thing to do.

Below are 8 steps that will help to free you from the fear of making mistakes or assist you in forgiving yourself:

 

1. If you are not making mistakes, you aren’t trying

To improve and succeed at any task, you must be willing to take the risk and taking risk means you might fail.  It is only natural for you to feel bad when you do, but you must remember, that is a sign you are making an attempt to find solutions to life’s problems.  Do not dwell on those mistakes but use them as a learning tool.  Learn the lessons and move on.  If you learn the lessons from your mistakes, you won’t make them again, and you will become stronger, wiser and more experienced.

 

2. Everybody makes mistakes

As human beings, we are bound to mess up, and that does not exclude anyone.  There are no road maps for dealing with life.  We live our lives by trial and error, so we will make mistakes. Even if someone else has done the job before, to take it to another level you run the risk of making a mistake.  Do not be deterred by that, but view it as an indication you are on to something and something special. Look at what you have done and work harder, but do not give up. You will eventually succeed if you do not quit.

3. Your failures are signs you are improving

When you find that you are making mistakes doing the right thing, do not become disheartened, it could mean you are on the right track.  Be encouraged and motivated knowing that your mistakes are helping you to become better at what you are doing.  You will also become stronger and more knowledgeable.  Work hard to make sure your mistakes are better every time.

 

4. Your failure means you are very courageous

It takes courage to make an attempt at something you have no idea will work or not.  You are investing your time, energy and money into something you have no idea what the results will be.  Even though you might have failed, the fact that you gave it everything you’ve got says a lot about who you are as a person.  Being courageous doesn’t mean you won’t be afraid, it only means even though you are scared to death you are courageous enough to make an attempt.

 

5. Your failures make you much stronger

After you have failed a few times, you would have become so much more resilient.  When you have failed it is normal to be discouraged, frustrated and even angry but if you choose to get over your disappointment and anger, you will realize how much stronger you are.  You will also be more determined to succeed and to prove to yourself and others that you can indeed succeed.

“Winners are not afraid of losing. But losers are. Failure is part of the process of success. People who avoid failure also avoid success.” – Robert T. Kiyosaki

6. Your failures help you to grow

When you have failed and have gotten over your disappointment, you are much more likely to dig deeper within you for strength you didn’t even know you had.  You will realize what you are truly made of and how resilient you are.  To become stronger and to grow you have to be stretched, and failure will help you to find within you the strength to continue.  Failure helps you move away from what is comfortable.

Many of us understand that sometimes things happen for a reason, and even though when we have failed the reasons aren’t necessarily clear at the time we know it does.  People who are open, will understand that their failure offers several other opportunities for them.  The saying when one door closes many more open is so true.  You must be willing to see the opportunities and go after them.  Failure is just one door closing with many more opening because of it.  Failure is never the end of your dream but the beginning of something bigger and better.

 

7. Your failures provide an opportunity for you to learn new things

Look at some of the most important people in history and see how they view failure. Thomas Edison said he didn’t fail he only found thousands of ways to solve the problem.  He was saying he was learning several other ways to solve the same problem.  This is the mentality you should develop.  Failure is not the end but an opportunity to learn something new and to try another method to solve the problem.

 

8. Your failure provides you with other solutions you never saw coming

If you never try you will never know if your ideas will work or not.  If you do not try, you will never know that you would have failed either, but it is better to have failed than to have regrets that you didn’t at least try.  Sometimes you are attempting to achieve something but the result is something totally different but even greater. Sometimes your failures turn out to be your best success story.

You will fail and continue to fail as long as you are prepared to attempt something foreign to you but do not give up.  Use your failures as stepping stone to your goals as the normal course of life and they should never be seen as a misfortune.

Use your failures as opportunities for further growth.

 

When you have hit a bad patch dig deeper, and you will eventually succeed if you do not give up.

Living and Breathing Your Passion (Inspirational Video)

Here is a great video by The Journey of Purpose which contains very inspiring messages by Randy Pausch, Steve Jobs and Will Smith.

This video is a huge eye opener and big wake up call for those who are just floating through life, not living everyday to their full potential.

It’s important to follow your passion, and these 3 wise men share why this is so.

 

Passion – Inspirational Video

 

7 Ludicrous Lies You Keep Telling Yourself

There are so many lies that society ingrained inside of you, that you adopted as you own. From your parents to your teachers, these lies snuck into your life, without you even realizing it.

Now it’s time to uncover them to achieve the success you truly deserve.

Here are 7 ludicrous lies you tell yourself that keep you away from success.

 

1. I shouldn’t fail

The most successful people fail and they fail often. If you want to speed up your path to success, take goal-aligned actions that are above what you think you’re capable of every single day.

Failing involves trying and moving out of your comfort zone.  If you avoid the risk of failing, you are setting yourself up for failure by default.

Remember:

“When we give ourselves permission to fail, we, at the same time, give ourselves permission to excel.” ~ Eloise Ristad

 

2. I shouldn’t be scared

We live in a society that tells us, “you must overcome your fears and radically eliminate them”. This makes us thrive towards an unrealistic state that we may never achieve.

Fear will only disappear when you do nothing, try nothing, be nothing.

It disappears when you stay within your comfort zone and avoid taking any kind of risks – but for that, you pay the price of a boring life.

The difference between those who succeed and those who don’t is not their degree of fear – but how they respond to it.

As Stephen Pressfield famously wrote in the ‘War of Art’:

 (“The amateur believes he must first overcome his fear; then he can do his work. The professional knows that fear can never be overcome. He knows there is no such thing as a fearless warrior or a dread-free artist.”   ~Steven Pressfield)

Accept your fears and use it as a catapult for progress by doing what needs to get done.

 

3. I should be able to do it alone

Successful people create an environment that supports their goals and surrounds themselves with the right people.

You don’t have to do it alone and find all the answers yourself.  A friend of mine once said:

“The more you ask, the more you can get.”

If asking makes you feel uncomfortable, become a giver. A person that gives feels no discomfort in asking, they see it as a mutual exchange of love.

“The strong individual is the one who asks for help when he needs it.  ~ Rona Barret  (Retweet this)

 

4. My circumstances are my problem

People view the problems that they encounter external to themselves. They blame others for what is happening or not happening. They blame the economy, the environment or anything else they can find.

Life is a projection and your problems are mere delusions of your thinking. In the philosopher’s notes on ‘Love what is’ by Byron Katie, there is a great little story that goes like this:

Imagine you’re in the cinema watching a movie. When the movie starts, you notice some smudge on the screen. So, you get up and try to wipe it off – but it doesn’t go away. You try harder and harder, but nothing changes. You get frustrated and annoyed and can’t enjoy the movie anymore.

The problem was never the screen but rather the projector that had smudge on its lens. Your mind is the projector and your life the movie screen. If you see smudge on the screen , you don’t need to wipe down the screen – but the projector that projects it.

Don’t go through life thinking you need to change the “movie screen” – your life – instead change the projector by changing the way you think.

 

5. I shouldn’t struggle

Your struggles are not your problem – your response to them is.  Some say the word struggle derived from  Proto-Germanic “strūkōną” – “to be stiff”. When you struggle, you don’t flow with life, accept, and embrace life as it comes.

What if you see your struggles as gifts that give you the optimal opportunities to grow, develop and mature? Eliminate the idea of struggles and problems: Life either presents itself as “blissful experiences or as blissful opportunities to learn”.

“Education comes from within; you get it by struggle and effort and thought.“ ~ Napoleon Hill

 

6. I just need to fix my weaknesses

Your areas of strength offer the biggest room for personal growth. Instead of wasting your time fixing weaknesses, going from terrible to mediocre, spend your time and energy to develop excellence. This can only be achieved by focusing on your natural talents and developing them into strengths.

Successful people are not well-rounded,instead they capitalize on their strengths and manage around their weaknesses. By fixing your weaknesses, you ultimately aim for average. It’s not the path to glory.

Play to win instead of play not to lose.

“Emphasize strengths, don’t fix weaknesses.” ~ Tim Ferriss

 

7. I need to have the end in mind

Stephen Covey talked about beginning with the end in mind, having a clear focus on where you are heading. But constant thinking about your goals means being mentally in the future, disengaged from the current moment.

Being mindfully present in the now with focused attention on the task, is the key ingredient for high performance.

In his book ‘Over-achievement’, psychologist John Eliot explains that overachievers act in the “trusting mindset”, being total engaged in what they are doing, without thought.

To live your best life, be present and mentally engaged in the now.  Success starts in this very moment, with the choices you make right now.

Yes, keep the end in my mind. Plan, dream and visualize – but have the “present moment” more present in mind. Will Smith was right when he said:

Which lie are you telling yourself? Let me know in the comments below!